Writing Without Fear: Overcoming Grammar Anxiety and Ignoring the Typo Police
You don't need to be a grammar or spelling expert to create useful writing; ignore the grammar hammers who pontificate otherwise.
True story: I don’t know even half the rules of grammar; I successfully edited a print magazine for a decade.
You don’t need to understand every grammar rule to write effectively.
It’s amazing how far Conjunction Junction and Lolly grabbing adverbs from Schoolhouse Rock can take you.
Over the past 30 years, I’ve written/edited nearly every type of content, yet if you asked me to explain a dependent clause or when to use who/whom you’ll just get a blank stare.
Typos, punctuation, and fear of grammar terrify folks into paralysis when it comes to writing. What if I make a mistake? Use the wrong word? I don't know where the commas go. Semi-colons? Colons!?!?!
This fear keeps many folks who would otherwise be fantastic contributors to blogs, social media sites, and elsewhere from sharing insights and knowledge that others would find useful.
I've seen people who successfully conceived, implemented, and then ran large IT implementations flee in terror from the idea of writing a 500-word blog post about their experience.
I blame pedantic grammar ass munches.
Are You This Person? Don’t Be This Person
I’ve had a knot of fear in my gut for the 30 years I’ve been publishing content – from a fax newsletter to the magazine to an online community to thousands of blogs and Web pages.
There’s a core of anxiety every damn time, from fear of making an obvious typo to my point being flawed in some way that I missed.
And there’s been at least one typo in most of what I’ve published. Hell, I had to correct a they’re/their typo on a LinkedIn post last week! That’s bad enough and I hate it.
The self-flagellation is bad enough.
Worse is some pedantic ass munch pointing it out to you.
I commented on a friend's Facebook feed a few years ago. I was quickly wrapped on the knuckles by someone for you're/your confusion.
This annoyed me for any number of reasons:
I hate making that mistake -- and typos/grammar booboos in general, even on social media.
It's personal social media, lighten up chicky-poo.
I don't do that to other people, so long as I can understand what point they're trying to make. Well, there are exceptions. I did have to correct the lovely and talented and one of my favorite co-workers ever, Lindsay Kelly, once that it's "y'all" not "yawl." But, c'mon, I'm from the south and that's essential knowledge!
It was a pathetic attempt to undermine my argument (like many on Facebook, I have friends and loved ones who have fallen for the con's con -- this was one of "those" types of posts).
Repeat After Me - TYPOS HAPPEN!
I don't care who you are, you will make a mistake in writing. It could be a typo, some sort of inconsistency, a grammar mistake . . . at some point if you publish a lot of a words . . . You. Are. Going. To. Make. A. Mistake.
And you know what? That's OK.
Authors routinely admit to fixing spelling and other errors in second editions of books. If they can do it, so can you. Especially since there’s a large team of people looking for mistakes in those situations. When it’s just you, or you and your editor, be kind to yourself.
If you're scared of writing because you might spell something wrong, don't worry about it. That's why Webster invented the dictionary (actually, that was Samuel Johnson who wrote the first English language dictionary).
Spellcheck in both Word and Google Docs is excellent, though not perfect. Find a friendly editor to both check the flow and spelling of your work. I find Grammarly annoying, but many folks swear by it.
Now, I’m not saying you get to write like a 9-year-old kid. But if you get the basics of punctuation (mostly) right, spell things correctly, and can manage subject-verb agreement; you’re ready to write.
If you’re a functioning adult, you can manage those three criteria.
You aren’t going to be taken seriously if you’re work is always riddled with errors. Let’s take three types of written communication nearly all of us use. There are degrees of correctness in work-related communication:
In-house platforms like Slack or Teams will depend on how uptight your culture is. However, if someone complains about spelling and typos in a brain dump or an “idea”-type document . . . I’m not going out on a limb by saying they’re focused on the wrong things.
Email — depends on your audience; lunch request or idea brainstorming — who cares; communication to customer or the CEO — spell check that bad boy.
Social media — professional account; tighten up that grammar and spelling. Personal account? Up to you. I try, but don't kill myself.
A quick thought about the auto-correct on phones -- we should all be forgiving of typos and misspellings. I type with my thumbs on a small screen; there are going to be mistakes. Let's give each other a break. Again, be kind. I consistently miss the “n” in “and” and fat-finger “I” and “o” on my phone. Is what it is.
If you want to write, using the “excuse” of grammar and spelling is the lamest of lame excuses.
That brings me to those killjoys who love to point out typos.
Pedantic Typo Assholes
I will admit that I LOVE to see a typo in a published book (and who doesn't love the fractured English in a Chinese menu?). For me, it's like a "whew, they aren't perfect either so that makes me feel better about myself."
However, some people just take delight in crapping on people's grammar, word choice, spelling, punctuation, etc.
Really? Don't you have anything better to do with your time?
ESPECIALLY on social media platforms which are more intimate and (until recently) friendly.
To everyone who keeps trying to express themselves with the written word: keep on trucking.
To all you pedantic assholes who delight in pointing out mistakes and booboos: fuck right off.
Still don’t want to write? I can do it for you — newsletter, email campaigns, blog, website, or whatever else you need: bryant@simplyusefulmarketing.co or 301-275-7496. Or message me here and I’ll be in touch ASAP.
Et cetera: OMG. Looking for an image to accompany the last heading and I typed in “panties in a bunch" without thinking. NOT safe for work. FYI. You're welcome.
I am in the midst of editing my next book, Bryant, and I can't tell you how much I appreciate this.